Dreams of Fortune

The recent California supreme court decision legalizing gay marriage (coupled with the fact that California's Novembers ballot measure to reverse it appears doomed) has highlighted a national trend. State after state is lining up to get a piece of the gay marriage action. And if New York follows suit, my childhood dream could become a reality. But only if I get the word out to the right people that I am gay. This is why I mention it so much on my blog. Marrying up is every American's dream and I am no exception. As a partial Italian, Columbia has provided a good avenue for me to marry into the mafia. Then I will be rich beyond all my wildest dreams and can finally forget all my current friends and be happy. Oh well, so much for dreams.

Final Comments About State College

State College has limited interesting people. Recall, however, that State College is in Pennsylvania. As such there are strict government limits on the number of interesting people that can live there and I blogged on most of them. It's a good thing I left when I did, because there really was no more material.

Speaking of material... The PSU material science building is called Steidle. It looks a lot like the Whitehouse from the front. Because of this a material science graduate student posted a flyer showing the building being destroyed by one of the alien ships from Independance Day.

Speaking of Steidle... Because Steidle is not in New York city, it can afford certain luxuries as compared to Havemeyer (the Columbia Chemistry building). It has a male bathroom on every floor (although like Havemeyer, it only has a female bathroom on every other floor). It has several fire exits. It has a door that remains unlocked 24/7. And... it has tons of drinking fountains.

Speaking of drinking fountains... Yum! Drinking fountains! Those were great! They meant I could cut back on drinking from my deadly nalgene water bottle, which has now been replaced by a SIGG aluminum bottle (Swiss made). I used to love that green nalgene bottle. But towards the end it always smelled funny and the plastic supposedly leeches chemicals. And the rubber on the lid turned from black to white.

Well, that about wraps it up for State College. And really, if the material on this blog was the only thing ever written about that city, it would be more than it deserved.

The People of State College Part Eighteen: Boring PI

Note: Before I quit talking about people from Pennsylvania, I will mention this guy.

The first floor of my apartment building I lived in this Summer had an office. On it's door hung a sign... "This is not the building office."

In fact, the office belongs to a private investigator. Your probably thinking, how exciting, right? Well, one couldn't be more wrong. I talked to this guy once while we both got our mail. He was depressing, straight laced, and all around boring. His office was messy, but not in any sort of glamorous way and it was always very bright. Maybe I'm alone on this but if I hire a PI I have certain expectations. That he smoke a cigar, sit in a dimly lit office, occasionally speak into a tape recorder. After all, one can't have just anyone spying on there loved ones. Who's with me? He won't be getting my business. I guess I'll just have to continue "checking up on" my friends myself.

The People of State College Part Seventeen: Hawaiian Barber

Note: State College seems so long ago, and I started this post a long time ago. Updates will follow on my current life in New York.

Downtown State College has at least a dozen barber shops, all of which are priced in the seventeen dollar range except one. Haircuts there are given by a female barber from Hawaii for a more affordable $12. At the beginning of my Summer stay I avoided the $12 locale, probably because of elitism. But right before I left I tried it out. She gave a damn good haircut. She told me how she always got threatening phone calls from the other barbers in town. They kept calling and begging her to raise her prices. She said in response she lowered her price to only ten dollars on Sundays and then they stopped calling. She had tons of attitude. For example, I told her the way I wanted my hair cut and she essentially refused and told me she would cut it the way she wanted it cut. But I like the end result. So no complaints. Actually, her husband is a doctor. Thus she really does not need to make all that much money cutting hair. So she is maybe a little selfish charging such a low price. But I don't judge. And she gave such a good haircut that if I ever find my way back to State College(which is looking increasingly unlikely), I will go there again.

Speaking of haircuts, recently I have been going to city college which is uptown(right on the border of Harlem and Washington Heights). Nearby I spied a haircut for only $10. So I tried it out (it was the first since the one referenced above). Because of language barriers, I now have incredibly short hair. End result: I may not be updating my profile picture on facebook for a while.

The People of State College Part Sixteen: The Blue Loop Bus Drivers

   A Chinese post doc and I went to play tennis today.  I sucked and he didn't know the rules.  On the way back we took the bus.  A bus went right past our stop and the driver pointed behind her but did not stop.  There were a lot of people on the bus so I assumed she was pointing at them and saying she didn't have room.  But I've ridden the 38 Geary in San Francisco and I know that no matter how many people are on a bus you can always fit at least three more.  That's just science.  So I was angered.  Especially because her bus was only three quarters full, tops.

   At this moment I looked down the street and realized that she hadn't been pointing to the people on her bus but rather to another bus behind her.  

   I'd become what I always hated.

   What I mean by that is while I usually try and distribute my hate equally, there is one group of people I hate above all others:  People who complain when a bus passes them and they don't realize that the reason that the bus didn't stop was because there was another bus coming right behind.  I just plain hate them.  

   Also, I learned today that even in small towns busses show up back to back.  There's a conspiracy in there somewhere.

Movie Review: Shotgun Stories

I want live in Arkansas. There is a statewide limit of twenty words to a conversation. For example: "You raised us to hate those boys, and we do, and this is what it's come to." Or, "My father died." "What'd you do?" "I said some things." "Do you think that was wise?" "Doesn't matter." Also, if me and my brothers get into feuds like they did in this movie then we will win. Because there are so many of us. And my little sister can join in too. Numbers help because in the movie they went back and forth killing brothers. So other families would run out before mine. And they started off with pets. And since my family has a lot of pets any other family would have to go through all of them before they could even start getting on my brothers and I.  Also people in Arkansas have names like Shampoo.  He was my favorite character.  He always stirred up trouble by telling Son and Kid and Boy how their dog got killed, or how their brother got killed.  Good old lovable Shampoo.  Also the movie made it seem really scenic.

Too bad they never explained how Son got shot in the back. But other than that I would recommend this one.

Movie Review: The Wanted

In this movie, a 1000 year old fraternity of assassins uses a loom to plan their next kill. They read a binary code from the the fabric. Some one in real life is going to do this and then the movie will get sued and it will be just what it deserves because this movie sucked!!!!!!  No, it was okay.  But seriously, Hollywood thinks all they need to have anymore are curvy bullets and everyone will be happy.