Saturday, May 31, 2008

Introduction

I have never had a blog before. However, I have also never had anything published and I don't have anything meaningful to say... so I am clearly qualified to blog. I intend to devote large sections of this blog to people that I meet who are far more interesting than myself (but not as interesting as the readers of this blog). Since this is a blog, a fair portion of it will also be devoted to random ramblings.  Finally, an occasional book or movie review will be thrown in. But first I must briefly introduce myself:

Hello,


ABOUT ME:
I am a graduate student studying at Penn State for the Summer. My (more) permanent home is  New York City. I have brown hair. And green eyes with brown specks. I was raised a west coast kid. I'm very progressive. I am studying chemistry.  Based on my incoming class of graduate students there is a 25% chance I am female and a 75% chance I am male.

PHOTOGRAPHS:
I didn't bring my camera from New York City but I think I can take a picture off facebook if any one is interested (conveniently all of those pictures are from before my face became horribly disfigured in a chemical accident). That last sentence was a joke and I just realized that some reader's face may have been disfigured in a chemical accident. If that is the case, sorry for being insensitive.

THOUGHTS ON HUMAN DECENCY:
Human decency is okay I guess. I prefer a pretense of decency and kindness for about six months followed by unimaginable cruelty.

THE NUMBERS:
I am 24 years old. I am above average height but not as tall as I could be. I am below average weight but not as skinny as I could be. I am above average nerdy but not as nerdy as I could be. I have zero piercings although I am not opposed to them. I do often accidentally cut myself though. I have above average intelligence(notice how few spelling errors I made in this post). I'm a slightly above average gay person (where average is Ellen Degenerous, Andrew Sullivan is way below average, and Rosie O'Donnell is way above average).

Based on the above numbers I have assigned myself a point value of 1000 points. Keep in mind this was a tricky calculation because most of the above numbers are not actual numbers but rather vague references to made up averages. However, since 1000 points is quite a high number of points, readers would be well advised to avoid questioning my methods.

FRIENDS:
I like to make my friends laugh but I wouldn't do anything for them. I'd need to know what I was getting in return first. I often make fun of anybody that I become friends with so as to build my self esteem. But I'm good at convincing people that my constant insults are only jokes and therefore no one usually takes offense.

BORING FILLER TO MEET MY PUBLISHING QUOTA:
I tend to watch comedies more than dramas; for example The Office and 30 Rock. I did see some episodes of Weeds though, and they were interesting. I like to play tennis. I am not super artistic but I like crafts or other projects that involve time and concentration. I like things that involve laughing. I am carless and I prefer to do things that involve walking places.

DISCLAIMERS:
I am below average weight for Pennsylvania... but probably not for New York City. Also, if you read the boring filler and were bored by it I cannot take responsibility. Things can only be made so clear.

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